Junk Mail

It seems junk mail is as prevalent as belly button lint these days. The junk is so 'there' that my internet service even has a junk mail attached to every regular mail I get. (Although technically this is a virus on the server side, which they have yet to address.)
My favorite junk mails are those that have the literary drivel at the bottom of the message. Gibberish designed to get past the spam blockers. For every message I block, another three arrive, seeking to sell me watches, Viagra, real estate, stocks, or offering closeout wholesale prices on old software.
My other favorites are those clever mails that borrow from somebody else's email, and send you a message claiming the undiscovered fun of sharing pictures or text messaging with your friends. I mistakenly went on one of those one time, put in my first name, and the site immediately filled in the rest of the blanks with all of my information, then froze and disappeared. I later checked with the person who I thought had sent the original message, but they claimed to have done no such thing.
Now I look on my blog, which no one reads but me, to discover I have a comment on a post I left back in June. Joy! I thought. Someone read my genius. But no, the comment was junk. One of those stock offerings where it starts at 25 cents, and they claim it'll go up to $1.25 overnight.
Didn't anyone see Boiler Room? Are there people out there who are duped by these solicited scams? Are they making money off of these phenomenal stocks?
Another junk mail I've been getting is supposedly from Paypal and eBay. Each of those sites sends a realistic message claiming my account is about to dry up, or somebody has messed with my identity and I'd better go quick and give them all my information again, just so they can confirm that I actually am who I say I am. The catch lies in the final warning of the message:

If you do not respond within 48 Hours! you risk the chance of losing your account.

They almost got me with that. But when I failed to respond within the dangerous 48 hour limit, I got another message with that very same warning. I've received them regularly every few days, each with that harried 48 Hour! boosting fear at the bottom of the message.

I'm still here. And they're still out to get me.